I went to Nando’s for the first time a while ago. I won’t be going again.
In fact, I’m now rather honestly of the opinion that if you like or enjoy the experience of going to Nando’s, you’re a bad person* who doesn’t know what actual taste is and just fills the void with contextless spice, like a bitter old tart who goes out and has meaningless sex with drunk young men in lieu of having some actual love in her life.
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Yeah, I’ve not done this for a while.
Why? Because in honesty, it’s quite difficult after a while to find new and exciting ways of writing “I didn’t eat much. I lost weight.”
I mean I suppose I could’ve said “I ingested little. My mass decreased”, or perhaps “Aught but greens did pass mine lips. I therefore became less rotund than in days previous.”
Alright, there’s two; let’s stop this now, shall we?
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I went to Wrexham the other day.
Now, I’m sure many readers of this infrequently updated cesspit have probably already cracked some hilarious joke about that in the confines of their own bedroom/lounge/head/train carriage/bus seat; something along the lines of “Well, someone has to”, “poor you” or similar, and to those readers, I offer these words:
Piss off.
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Alright, I know I haven’t done one of these in ages, stop going on about it will you? Leave me alone.
Yeah, sorry for the lack of blogging. Having to do a shed load of writing in work combined with running low on ideas for these posts has hampered me somewhat recently, but I’m back and ready to write some words about losing weight – maybe the finger movements are worth a few calories, who knows?
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Right. Blogging. Humour, and words and whatnot.
So… How are you?
I’m running out of ways to start these things.
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I know, it’s late. I tell you what, I won’t charge for this one, eh?
So then, this is the missing recap blog entry that would normally go up on Wednesday evenings, except it didn’t. Why? Well, for two very good reasons:
Number one, I went to a different Slimming World group this week, and they have their sessions on Thursday. Number two, I just haven’t had chance with one thing and another.
So, from here on in, let’s pretend it’s Thursday, eh?
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Afternoon all, this edition of Weight a Minute is being brought to you slightly earlier than usual due to me being off work and having a house viewing this evening, meaning I went to Slimming World’s morning session instead of the evening one.
Remember last week, when I’d lost 11lbs, and said I wanted to hit my stone this week?
Guess what?
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Rest in peace, Randy.
Right then. Second week on the diet, third weigh-in.
Now, I went in with absolutely no expectations whatsoever again: Last week was my first week, and you always have a good loss after your first week apparently – so anything would have been lovely.
Anyway, I arrived at the meeting, paid, and then the scales beckoned. On I get, watching the numbers go nuts for a moment before they decided where they were settling.
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Just a quick something, on the subject of exercise.
Y’know I was asking for new workout music? Well, I found a couple of things.
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So, it’s been a week.
Yeah.
Today, I had my first weigh-in.
Now, I had no idea what to expect when I stepped on the scales. People were telling me that I was going to have lost loads, but I wasn’t so sure. Due to a combination of the fact that I’ve been dieting in some way shape or form for the last few weeks (your body shifts weight quickly to begin with, before slowing down) and not wanting to get my hopes up too much, any loss would have been good. My aim, if you remember, was to lose two pounds a week, but secretly I was hoping for six in my first fortnight.
So, I got to my meeting this evening, went through the ceremonial derobing, and hopped on.
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